Forever Us Read online

  Seeing this poor little boy being dragged into an adult soap opera caused anger and outrage to wash over me like a tidal wave that was pulling me towards the shore. Overcome with emotion, I felt totally unable to stop the words that came out of my mouth through clenched teeth as I shot my gaze to the woman who’d given birth to me.

  “What have you done?”

  My mother, looking like she’d just stepped off the pages of Vogue, stood in the middle of this quiet chaos, holding court with an air of authority fitting of the tormenting puppet master she was. Only someone who knew her as well as I did would be able to discern that her expression to my question might have appeared innocent, like she had absolutely no clue what I was talking about, but actually held the exact opposite meaning. Her eyes were covertly scanning the room to decide what her next move was going to be in this real-life game of chess she was playing, in which we were all pawns.

  Her tone turned sympathetic, and I thought I might actually throw up. “Catherine, all I’ve done is facilitate a family reunion. You know what it’s like not to know your father. Do you really want the same thing for this poor boy?” Then, turning to the reporter and photographer, my mother lowered her voice to a theatrical whisper. “Catherine’s father was killed, tragically, before her birth.”

  Fury was rolling through my body as I heard the patent lie my mother told every time the question of my father came up. Or maybe it wasn’t a lie—I had no idea. All my mother had ever told me about the other half of my DNA were variations of the same story.

  “I tried to think of the ugliest man I slept with, because that’s obviously who your father is. Just look at you. I named you after the one I settled on, although I honestly don’t even think he was hideous enough to account for what I see when I look at you. God. How can you live with yourself? Look in the mirror. How can you not want to throw up?”

  “You never knew your father, Catherine. And now you’re dating someone who is a father. Do you think there is any correlation?” Johanna asked, her pen poised and ready to scribble every detail of my answer and, probably more importantly, my reaction to her question.

  “Um…well…I didn’t… I mean… I don’t… I mean.” My tongue felt like it was too big for my mouth, and I couldn’t get a coherent thought to form in my head if my life depended on it.

  Stumbling over my words like a drunk trying to walk a straight line was the last thing I wanted to be doing right now, but it looked like my ability to handle awkward situations had not magically improved in the last seventy-two hours since I’d made a fool of myself on national television.

  “Looks like Cat’s got her own tongue…again,” my mother joked, repeating the joke that Byron, the self-professed Howard Stern of late night, had cracked at my expense. Her jovial voice held a sharp edge that I knew, from experience, could cut fatally deep.

  Jace, who had remained still and not said a word since my mother had announced that he was a father, wrapped his arm around my waist and protectively pulled me towards him. I knew that it shouldn’t have made me feel as good as it did. This situation was so much bigger than me. But I couldn’t help it—I melted against him.

  “Excuse my daughter, please. Now I guess you know why I have sheltered her from the public.” My mother moved towards Johanna and Peter, whose respective demeanors exuded absolute understanding of her plight.

  Kiss ups!

  Jerry chose this time to put in his two cents. “Cat is such an embarrassment that we were sheltering the public from her. Honestly, you have no idea how harrowing it has been for Angelica to raise such an inept—”

  Jace flinched beside me, and before I could stop him, he’d stepped around me and was heading straight towards Jerry, his voice sounding deadly calm. “What did I tell you about talking that way about Cat?”

  This is bad.

  “I think dinner’s over,” I said as I reached out, wrapped my hand around Jace’s arm, and tugged him backwards with all my might, which felt like I was trying to move a mountain. “Jace, let’s go.”

  At the panic in my voice, Jace spun his head towards me, and for a second, I thought he was going to resist. But then, thankfully, he came with me. With less grace than I would have liked, I clumsily made my way towards the exit while corralling Sandy, Brandy, and Evelyn, who were all doing really great impressions of mannequins, standing perfectly still with a look of horror on each of their beautiful faces.

  Luckily, once Sandy realized what I was doing, she helped out, even motioning for Natalya to follow and saying just low enough for Natalya, Jace, and I to hear, “You too, baby mama.”

  I appreciated Sandy’s effort, but it wasn’t like Natalya needed to be told to follow us. That was pretty much a given. I knew there was no way she would let Jace out of her sight.

  I had no idea how this was all going to play out. All I knew is that I needed to get Jace far away from my mother and Jerry. Now. Characterizing this as a life-or-death situation was not being dramatic. If Jace got his hands on Jerry, there was no doubt in my mind that that’s exactly what it would quickly dissolve into.

  Life and death.

  Chapter 2

  Jace

  Heated adrenaline was coursing through my veins as I allowed Cat to drag me through the foyer and out the front door of the house. My heart was pounding so hard that I thought it might literally explode in my chest. Every muscle in my body was alive, loose, and ready for a fight.

  I knew it was different for everyone, but I was at my calmest right before I faced any kind of dangerous, volatile or violent situation. I always had been. When my pulse was speeding out of control and my body was at my most amped up, everything else defaulted to an almost monk-like state of Zen. Once it started, I couldn’t turn it off.

  Currently, I could feel myself systematically shutting down and going into battle mode, as my vision narrowed to a tunnel and all I could see was Cat walking in front of me.

  Cat. She was all I could see.

  Somewhere in my brain, I was aware that we weren’t alone, that her roommates, Natalya, and the boy Natalya was claiming was my son, were following us, but all I could do was focus on Cat. If I didn’t do that, I was going to turn around, go back into the house, and knock that smug grin off Jerry’s face.

  Since the first second I’d met him, I’d been waiting for him to do something, anything, that would justify me beating the shit out of him. He’d given me the perfect opportunity, but the second I’d felt Cat’s fingers wrap around my forearm and heard the fear in her tone, I knew I had to stand down. Not that it had been easy. Walking away from that asshole had been one of the fucking hardest things I’d ever had to do.

  But I had done it. For Cat.

  I barely registered the heat of the afternoon sun hitting my face as my head swam with questions. None of this made sense. Natalya didn’t have a kid. I didn’t have a kid. And we sure as fuck didn’t have a kid together.

  The cotton of my button-up shirt pulled taut against my chest with each heavy breath I took. The sound of the waves was the only thing I could hear over my erratically beating heart. Then I realized we were heading down the wooden path that led to the beach, and before the thought had even fully formed in my mind, I heard the question leave my mouth.

  “Where are we going?” I sounded cold, detached.

  “The beach,” Cat answered without even sparing a glance over her shoulder as she practically jogged, dragging me behind her.

  “Why?”

  “Because they won’t follow us out here.”

  I had no idea why that was the case, but I knew that Cat had said that the beach and the kitchen were the two places she would go to escape her mom when she was having episodes.

  Knowing that I needed to calm down before we reached wherever our destination happened to be, I decided that, instead of focusing on what I was feeling, I needed to transfer all of that energy into figuring out how to fix this for Cat. This shitstorm of a situation was my fault. It was up to me to push down
the visceral rage I was feeling and I needed to do it now. Her mother had once again used me to hurt Cat and I just wanted to make it okay.

  The last thing Cat needed was for me to lose it or check out by having a panic attack. It was my job, as her man, to be here. Be present. Protect Cat. From her mother. Jerry. And now, Natalya.

  As if my thoughts had somehow summoned her, I heard Natalya’s voice from behind me and felt her hand press against my back. “Jace.”

  After stopping on a dime, I spun around so fast that I was surprised that a puff of dust didn’t explode around me. Then, my hands rose in a protective stance. “Don’t touch me.”

  Natalya’s only reaction was a single eyebrow raise. Unfortunately, my unexpected halt caused Sandy, Brandy, and Evelyn—who were all walking single file behind Natalya and the boy—to clumsily bump into each other, Three Stooges style. It was a full-on head-bumping, arms-flailing, hair flying, tripping, bumbling, three-person pileup.

  Cat sucked in a startled breath at the same time that I…burst out laughing. I knew, logically, that it wasn’t funny. Maybe my reaction was just a byproduct of the stress of the day, the week, the month. I didn’t know, but before I could get myself together, I heard another laugh that—other than being higher in pitch—sounded identical to mine.

  Looking down, I was shocked to find that the familiar sound was coming out of the little boy’s mouth. My shock turned to speechlessness when I noticed that his mouth was wide open and his right hand was over his stomach—the exact same way I was holding mine now. What I did every time I really cracked up.

  A chill ran through my body and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up just as his tiny head tilted up and a pair of striking, blue eyes locked with mine. The second Gavin saw that my attention was on him, his mouth snapped shut, his shoulders slumped, and he dropped his head, choosing to stare at the ground.

  It was obvious that he thought he’d done something wrong, and a voice inside my head was screaming for me to tell him that he hadn’t. To kneel down and make sure he knew that he was safe and, if he wanted to laugh, he could laugh. But, instead of doing that, I found myself frozen in place, staring down at a small head covered in jet-black hair that was shimmering in the strong California sunlight.

  “Whoa. Talk about an audio-visual DNA test.” Sandy’s words floated through my head.

  I felt Cat move up beside me at the same time that I heard her voice. I knew she was talking, but it sounded far away, like she was standing down a long tunnel, and I couldn’t make out what she was saying. Her words sounded like she was speaking with marbles in her mouth.

  The only thing I could register or process was that my son was standing a foot away from me.

  My son.

  What the fuck?

  Until that moment, I hadn’t believed there was a chance in hell that the kid was mine. I’d been sure that it was just another stunt Natalya was pulling. Granted, it was a lot more elaborate than any in her past, but now, she had the unlimited resources and the evil plotting of Angelica and her minion, Jerry.

  When Angelica had made her little announcement, I’d been shocked. But not because I’d thought there was any remote possibility that she’d been telling the truth. I just hadn’t been able to believe the lengths she would go to just to fuck with me and Cat. I’d stood there like an idiot, trying to put the puzzle pieces together in my head as to how Natalya was there, right in front of me.

  All I’d come up with was that somehow she’d found out about Natalya, which, since I was, evidently, her ‘in case of emergency’ and she’d just had a stint in the hospital for an apparent attempted suicide, would probably not have been that difficult. So what then? Had Angelica James called Natalya, they’d come up with a scheme, and then Angelica had cast some kid in the role of ‘Jace’s son’?

  As crazy as that sounded, that was honestly the conclusion I’d come to right before I’d heard Cat stumbling over her words, and then, like I was returning from an out-of-body experience, I’d been back in the dining room. The next thing I’d heard was that asshole putting Cat down. Then she’d grabbed me and I’d followed her.

  And that was it.

  Not once had I entertained the idea that Gavin was mine.

  “Jace.”

  Cat’s voice snapped me out of my temporary mental and physical paralysis. Lifting my head, I saw her huge, brown eyes gazing up at me, filled with worry as they searched mine. I recognized the look I saw staring back at me because it was the same visual inspection I often gave her.

  “Cat!” a small voice called out from down at the beach.

  What now?

  Everyone’s attention turned to the steps that led to the beach, and I saw the boy we’d met the first day we’d arrived.

  Damn, that had only been four days before. How was that possible? So much had happened in such a short amount of time.

  “Hi, Christian,” Cat said a little too cheerily as I felt her slender fingers wrap around my forearm. After looking up at me then back at Natalya, she said, “Why don’t I take Gavin and the girls down to the beach to meet Christian? You two can talk.”

  “No,” I said.

  “Fine,” Natalya said, at the same time that I protested.

  An encouraging smile lifted on Cat’s face as she spoke calmly. “We’ll just be down at the water. We won’t go far. Okay?”

  No. Not okay. I need you here. With me.

  I nodded because I didn’t trust myself to speak. How had I gone from never needing anyone to not knowing what I would do if this person was forty feet away from me?

  I watched as Cat bent down to Gavin. His head barely moved, but I did see that his eyes lifted up to meet hers. “Hi, Gavin. I’m Cat, and these are my friends Sandy, Brandy, and Evelyn. And down there is my friend Christian. Would you like to go down to the water with us?”

  A knife twisting in my chest—that’s what seeing the look that crossed Gavin’s face did to me. He looked terrified but also like he was desperately trying to be brave. His tiny chest was rapidly rising and falling beneath his Spongebob Squarepants shirt. The expression on his face reminded me of a fear I’d had as a kid when I’d had no idea what the right move was and no one to tell me.

  Not wanting him to feel that way, I said, “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to, but the sand is pretty amazing and you might even see some sand crabs.”

  His baby-blue eyes shot up to mine, and for just a moment, he seemed shocked that I had spoken, but he quickly recovered. Puffing out his chest, he stood a little straighter, turned his face to Cat, and nodded just once.

  Cat stood and squeezed my arm once before reaching for Gavin’s hand, “Let’s go meet Christian.”

  Her voice sounded happy and carefree, and I could see the expression of relief in Gavin’s eyes as he lifted his small arm and placed his hand in hers. Then Cat’s roommates followed her and Gavin down the wooden steps to the beach below.

  I watched Cat’s long, dark hair as it blew in the wind, as she focused completely on Gavin while she talked to him. I had no idea what she was saying, but seeing them walk together, hand in hand, made me feel so overwhelmed with love that I had to step back when it hit me square in the chest. I knew I loved Cat—that was a no-brainer. But how in the world could I feel love for this little person I hadn’t even known existed a half hour ago?

  I had no fucking idea…but that didn’t change the way I felt.

  Chapter 3

  Cat

  Don’t cry. Keep smiling. Do. Not. Cry.

  “Cat, I thought you left.” Christian ran up, meeting me as we made it to the bottom step before he threw his arms around me.

  I hugged him back and ruffled his honey-blond hair. “I’m leaving in a little bit.”

  I was relieved that I’d gotten the chance to say goodbye to Christian. I knew that with all the craziness of the day, there was no way I would have remembered, and I had given him my word.

  Moving to the side, I put my hand on Gavin’s should
er and was shocked to feel his tiny bone so pronounced. I hoped I didn’t allow any of that reaction to bleed onto my face as I made introductions.

  “Christian this is my friend, Gavin. Gavin, this is Christian.”

  Neither of the boys said anything. Gavin looked down at his feet while Christian just stared at him. I knew I was grabbing at straws, but since I didn’t really know what boys Gavin’s age—not that I even knew how old Gavin was—were into, I lead with something I knew Christian could talk about for days.

  “You know what, Gavin? Christian has an ant farm that has hundreds of ants and he named them all.”

  That got mini-Jace’s attention. He lifted his head, his eyes as big as saucers. “You have ants that work on a farm?”

  For a moment, I thought that Christian might get upset and think that Gavin was making fun of him, but instead, he simply answered, “No, they live in glass and make little trails in dirt and stuff. I don’t know why they call it a farm either. Do you want to see it?”

  “Yeah.” Gavin nodded enthusiastically, unlike his response when I’d asked him if he’d wanted to go with me.

  “Come on.” Christian waved his hand for Gavin to follow him to where he had his ‘fort’ set up down the beach.

  “Stay where I can see you!” I called after the two boys as they ran, sand kicking up behind them.

  “Ho-ly sh-it!” Sandy whisper-yelled as soon as the two pairs of little ears were out of range.

  Every muscle in my body chose that moment to go on a break. My legs went wobbly, and before I knew it, I’d plopped down and was flat on my rear. The girls all swarmed around me, dropping down to the sand. There was a chorus of, “Are you okay?” and “It’s gonna be all right.”

  Is it?